Okay this is our last blog before we jump on the boat here in Palau...

Thursday we rented scooters and scooted about 40 minutes to the Tiger Temple. Yes, a tiger temple. No the monks are not tigers but they take care of tigers. We did the morning program with 8 other people.

We got to play with the tiger cubs for about an hour. A quick note... I don't much like cats. I was recently attacked by a large rather vicious 2 month old kitten and thought I might lose my hand to its vicious mauling so I am a little more timid. Suzi and Tammy on the other hand threw themselves into the middle of the cubs. They were hugging them and squeezing them and giving them new names. It was all fine and good until one of the cubs took a liking to Suzi's t-shirt sleeve. When I say liking I mean this cub decided he wanted Suzi's shirt as chew toy. At first she tried to pull the cub off and it got more aggressive and more vocal. The cute little cub started pulling Suzi's shirt off her shoulder. Two of the workers came over and started to pry the cubs jaws open. Suzi, and two workers were using all their strength to get this 20 pound 2 month old tiger kitty to let go of her shirt. At this point he was getting mad and his claws came out. Claws I tell you ... claws. After a bit more effort they got him to release and Suzi had scratches and everything. That's right Suzi got scratched by a tiger.

Now wanting to be out done, Tammy who was playing with a cub had it begin to "teeth" on her shoulder. That's right folks a Tiger Cub wanted to use Tammy as a chew toy. At first it wasn't much pressure and then I saw this look come into Tam's eyes... "I am baby tiger food!" Again a couple of workers came to her aid and pried him off. At this point I went into a corner and started sucking my thumb. All I could think is if this is what happens with the cubs how are we going to survive the grown up tigers with paws as big as Tammy's head? Tammy ended up getting bruise and lacerations. Yes folks the tiger drew blood. If the bigger tigers would have gotten a whiff of her blood it would have been a massacre. I alone would have survived as the only one with sense enough not to cuddle a tiger.

Note: do not let them close to Grizzly Bear cubs when they go to the Tetons. These girls just don't think right when it comes to animals.

After the cub maulings we took the larger cubs to a waterfall pool area.
Shawna did you just say "larger" cubs?
Why yes, yes I did...
And weren't Tammy and Suzi just playing with SMALLER cubs?
Why yes they were.
So this means the pool is filled with 40-100 pound tiger cubs would this be fair to say?
Why yes it would.

They let the tigers into the pool and asked like it was normal, "Who wants to get into the pool of death with the man eating tiger cubs?" Okay I lied they didn't say pool death or man-eating, but that's only because they are liars and I am not...really I am not.

I moved by the spirit of life preserved immediately said "Hell to the no." Suzi and Tammy looked at each other with this non-verbal ..."today is a good day to die" kind of look and both raised their hands. "We'll go in! We'll go in!" Tammy saying something along the lines of... "How can we pass up a chance to play with tigers in a waterfall?"

I will tell you, just say "No".

Another thing, and lets be honest, cat pee at its best is not a scent you seek out delibrately. That said, they let us walk our tigers back to their pens.... on a leash. As we were walking our cat he stopped at a tree. Now I am no animal behaviorist but I have been to a zoo and I have seen a tiger spray. I was concerned this might be the event about to take place.

Why I did not verbalize this to Tammy, I can't tell you. It's like I didn't know how to articulate "That tiger is about to pee!" Fortunately for Tammy she moves quickly. Unfortunately for all of us, not quickly enough. She caught a little of the spray on her shirt, which she carried with her and us for the rest of the day.

So for those of you reading from home. Suzi got her shirt eaten and arm scratched by a tiger cub. Tammy was bit, yes bit, by a tiger and to top it off peed on. They and I had the best time ever... go figure.

We have more on the Tiger Temple but are just to tired. We'll fill in the blog as soon as we can.

View from room

Oriental Kwai rescue dog - Brownie

Wednesday morning we left Chiang Mai and the Prison Spa... It's okay to cry right? We flew back to Bangkok and then took what turned out to be a 4 hour taxi ride to Kanchanaburi. Don't try to pronounce it took us till just now.

We had planned to get there early enough to go to the Erawan Falls but Evelien at The Oriental Kwai said it would be too late to spend any time there. We also asked about getting a taxi to take us to the Death Railway Museum or to the Bridge over the River Kwai, but again it would be pushing it. So time just wouldn't allow us to go anywhere..

Okay we lied... not about the time crunch thing but about our real reason for not wanting to leave the resort. It is BEAUTIFUL!!! As we pulled up Evelien the woman who owns it with her husband Djo, came out to meet us with a few of their staff. They brought us lemon grass ice tea. And gave us such warm sweet welcome.

Evelien showed us around the resort and to our cottage which overlooked... drum-roll please... the River Kwai. That's right folks at home we had dinner and breakfast as we watched the River Kwai float by. We had fruit shakes out on the patio of our cottage listening to the crickets and watching the River Kwai. In the morning the sounds of all the bugs chirping in the cool air was nearly deafening. It was absolutely wonderful sitting by the River Kwai.

Now before you start thinking we are rich and want to borrow money... We won't tell you what we spent... that would be rude unless we're talking about Youth Hostels. It has got to be THE BEST VALUE in Thailand. For the record we are not rich and even if we were we wouldn't loan you money.

When you see the pictures, you'll at least get an idea of how amazing this place is.

Now we know what you are thinking, "Okay so it's got an amazing view and 1st class accommodations with great food and fruit shakes that have them looking at bananas in a whole new way. What about all their friends back at the Prison Spa? Don't they miss them? To gain all this only to lose their daily massages? Aren't they heart broken?" See we knew, we knew what you were thinking... uncanny huh?

Well massage addiction is a fickle mistress and our only loyalty is to our trip theme. We casually asked Evelien if there was any place to get a massage as we heard that a lot of people do that when they visit Thailand. She highly recommended a local spa there in Kanchanaburi "SUAN". Suzi made a move to embrace Evelien but Tammy thankfully stopped her before Evelien could see us for the addicts we've become.

We said we would figure out our schedule and let her know whether to book it or not. Moments later as we discussed what time would be best, I noticed Tammy was shaking a bit...the first signs of withdrawal were manifesting. Her voice a bit high pitched said, "I am just worried if we don't get it booked now we won't get our fix... I mean our massage tonight."

We are going to need a intervention. We realize this and we will get ourselves into a program, but we would prefer a program that slowly weans us. Maybe we could start with 5 massages a week for the first few weeks and then go to 4 and 1/2 over the next several weeks, and so on. We will be setting up a fund that you can donate to to help us with our recovery.

Suan's was amazing... seriously wonderful. Even better, dare we say it than the Prison Spa. Their style was a little more gentle and all three of us fell asleep through our treatments.

We need help. Please donate.

Hi my name is Tammy and I am an addict.
Hi my name is Suzi and I am an addict.
Hi my name is Shawna and I'm in denial.

Doing it like tourists

Monday night while coming home from our massages with the rehabilitated prisoners, we ran into the LDS missionaries who were on their bikes heading home. They called one of the people from their congregation who drives taxi and speaks English. If she was a licensed massage therapist she would have had the trifecta and been canonized our Thailand Saint.
They called her right there while we visited on the street and arranged for her to pick us up in the morning. See what happens when you do a good deed for the Prison Program and get a massage... the good karma just keeps on coming.



This turned out to be a "typical tourist" day. Not that we hadn't been doing some rather tourist type stuff all along, but this took us on the traditional route tour buses are running folks to see.



Our little sweet taxi driver Thor (not to be confused with the God of Thunder), was wonderful and very accommodating. She wanted to take us to all the things that most folks seem to enjoy. So, we started with the Doi Su Thep Temple which is up on a hill overlooking all of Chiang Mai. It is very picturesque on a clear day and when they are not renovating the temple. That said, it was still a very beautiful building and a source of pride, for the people of Chiang Mai for good reason.



There are over 300 steps to the top. Everyone kept telling me the exact number but I kept ignoring them hoping the sweet little monks would have installed an escalator before we arrived. They did not, something about sacrifice bringing forth the blessings of Buddha. (If the three of us win the lottery or something you should all come out here and climb yourself some steps.)



A couple of the fine points about visiting a Buddhist Temple:

There are plenty of folks who wear shorts and tank tops and it seemed like in most temples the monks won't say a word. In others they will ask you to rent something to be properly attired. We had actually done our home work. When visiting most of the temples we wore skirts or long pants. Not to jump on a soap box or anything, but these are sacred places to the people of this faith and they are very kind to allow us into a part of their world to enjoy the beauty, history and culture. It seems like honoring their faith in this way is a small thing to do as an outward manifestation of our inward thanks for their abundant graciousness.



Okay we are off our soap box.



Over the course of the day we visited:

• A silk factory where we saw how silk was made and learned why it was so expensive. One of the little facts that blew us away is that from a single silk worm cocoon they get a 500 meter length of silk thread. One cocoon... 500 meters. They had a shop where they produce the silk and weave the the cloth. There were some really nice clothes and oddly enough they were all very soft and smooth, like silk.


• We also saw how they make lacquerware, umbrellas, rugs, and jewelry. It was interesting and the amount of time that goes into making these items is amazing, but to be honest it was just not our cup of tea.

We also visited the Hill Tribe people from Burma who came to Thailand as refugees over 20 years ago. They have been moved around 3 times over the 20 year period and there is a lot of political debate about how they are being dealt with.

We don't know nearly enough to make any sort of comment. (That's a first.) They also create a lot of hand crafted items which they sale in their village. Truth is, it felt a little voyeuristic and yet they depend on tourist buying their wares to make a living. They also farm, have live stock, and chickens and seem to have built a life for themselves.

The "Long Neck Tribe" refers to the tribe whose women wear these heavy brass coils. They don't make their necks longer but the coils push their shoulders down. It seems painful and archaic and it is hard not to impose our Western values on their cultures and traditions. Truth is they would probably find our tradition of accumulating and consuming rather silly.

The one empirical comment we can make is that the women and girls of this tribe are beautiful. Not your ordinary beautiful... no they are stunningly beautiful and we found ourselves staring, not because of the neck coil but because their faces are just so darn pretty.

We also went to the CORNIEST Snake Show in the history of Snake Shows. This being my one and only.... that make not be a fair statement... no I lied; it's fair. It was the CORNIEST ever. The Thai guy had a sound system with loud music that he would turn up and down modulated by his comic narrative. His common lines were:

• "Ohhh dangerous!!! Do not try this at home!"
• "Dees ees the most vemonoous snake in Thailand. He bite you; you die. You die we no take you to the hospital"
• "Dees are well trained boys. Do not try dis or you die. You die we no take you to the hospital"

If we'd been thinking we would have done a video. Loaded it on You tube and made a fortune. But the BEST part was watching Suzi wet herself on at least three occasions. At one point they threw the snake out of the pit up into the audience. Now on a good day Suzi is pretty fast. On Snake Day she is a blur heading to the top row of the bleachers.

Tammy and I were laughing too hard to move. So if the snakes had bit us, we die and they no take us to hospital. We got back from the tourist traps and were feeling pretty stressed out with the snake attacks and all. So we scheduled our last massage in Chiang Mai. I saw Suzi cry a little when we were leaving.

If you are planning a trip to Thailand, we would suggest skipping this day except of course for the massage.

Missing you... okay we lied. We're having the time of our lives and don't so much miss you as we wish you were here... really.

suzi, tammy & shawna

Flight of the Gibbons

Monday we didn't really have anything scheduled except some sort of a massage. (We are all very task and goal oriented. You have to admire our persistant dedication to worthy causes.) One of the folks at Church on Sunday recommended we do "Flight of the Gibbons".

If involves going on zip lines through the jungle/forest canopy. The woman who recommended it had never done it herself, but with our "what the hec" mantra, that was recommendation enough.

We were picked up by a luxury Toyota van. I am not being sarcastic. It was big and had all leather interior. It had a pretty good A/C system once they turned it on after one of us said "I can't breathe."

We went with a couple from Canada, Tara and ? who are living in Korea teaching English (who knew Canadians could teach English?). And one other couple. Ali, was from Iran and and I cannot remember where Mira (I think I got that totally wrong) was from, but it is a country close to Italy. I am sure you can figure out which one. Mira is a photo journalist and has spent a lot of time in Afganistan. He was looking into getting into a culinary school. Part of the schooling would take place in Bangkok.

They were a fun group for the adventure. Now about the adventure, Gibbons are a monkey. At least this is what they tell us. We don't know what color their fur is or if they like bananas or if any of them have ever hung out with Cheeta on a Tarzan set. See, we didn't see any Gibbons, not even a Gibbon, not even Gibbon poop.

The guide told us that they are there in the morning and they are sleeping in the afternoon. They probably tell the morning group the Gibbons sleep late and come out for a late lunch. I was okay with it. I had visions of us zipping through their jungle and them throwing rotten bananas at us while we dangle from a thin wire. Monkeys run in a wild gang and I wasn't sure if we were wearing the right colors for their hood, so it is probably just as well.

All that being said about no monkeys, except for Tammy of course, it was a great time. There were about 15 different platforms that we zipped across going from tree to tree. Some of the lines were at a steep enough pitch that we needed to use a "brake". See how I put brake with the little quotes, now I am being sarcastic.

The "brake" was not a sophisticated piece of climbing equipment involving a lot of 2nd and 3rd fail safe mechanisms. The brake was a piece of bamboo a "V" shape to be exact "^" but if I just put that you would think I was cussing.

At each station they would tell us whether we would need to use the brake or not. ... Seems to me like I would be a better judge of whether I need to use a brake or not... Tammy and Suzi just told me I am lying. (They don't know anything.)

They also told us they would tell us when to put on the brake. Again, I am sorry, but I have seen the way the Thai drive and "braking" is not their strong suit, so I was dubious that they be the folks controling when and how we stopped as we go careening through the tree tops. Plus you just never knew when a Gibbon might pop out to use us as target practice.

I kept a very brave face because I didn't want to scare Tammy or Suzi. Those who know them, know how timid and what scardied-cats they are. Alright, I lied. These two make me look like a nervous Nelly. On the repel lines Tammy always wanted to go head first. I don't know why, maybe she thought her face would do a better job at breaking her fall and Suzi was all "I don't need no stinkin' brake!".. Very Thai like...

It was a ton of fun. But the best part was the forest and the trees. They were... magnificent. And the pictures just won't do them justice.

After we got back to Chaing Mai... we... okay say it with us... had a massage.

Chiang Mai's Sunday Night Market

The only food we didn't eat at the Night Market

A quick recap:

Tuesday mid-morning - We left SLC and then spent about 9 hours in LAX at the Crown Room.

Wednesday about 2:00 in the morning - flew Korean Air to Korea... go figure. Most of Wednesday was lost as a penalty tax for being capatalist crossing the international date line

Thursday - Overnight in Manila where we had our 1st Southeast Asia massage

Friday - Flew into Bangkok. Saw Grand Palace and took an overnight train to Chiang Mai. Foot massage @ train station

Saturday - PAINTED with an ELEPHANT. Checked into Green Tulip. Had 1st Thai massage.

Today is actually Wednesday so we have a few days to catch up on the news. Saturday evening we checked into the Green Tulip Guesthouse, which is inside the walls of the "Old City". It was close to just about everything: Sunday Night Market, several Wats (Temples) and most importantly the Prisoners Massage Spa.

This place was rated "Cleanest Hostel of 2008". It is bright and cheery with 17 rooms, some with a private bath and A/C and others where you share a bathroom and the rooms have ceiling fans. We splurged and went for the 1st class accomdations and it cost the three of us about $13.00 each, for a room with a queen bed and a twin mattress.

We found out that the LDS church as literally just 1/2 a block away, so Sunday morning we walked over to the little Chapel and attended their Sacrament Meeting. If it had been more than 1/2 a block away we may not have made it as we doubted anyone there would give us a massage and it really didn't fit into our theme.

Sunday afternoon we walked around the city visiting a local Temple and taking in the sites. We had a relaxing three hour lunch at a little hole in the wall. Which brings me to another sad confession: So far we have eaten Pad Thai or Chicken & Rice (We don't know the Thai name but somehow manage to get the point across and we think they are bringing us chicken; we hope it is chicken.)

See this is all we order because this is the only thing we know. It is very cowardly. And we are a little ashamed... I lied; I am ashamed. Suzi and Tammy have no shame. So if you are reading this blog for information on what to eat in Thailand, well that is a real dumb reason to read this blog and you deserve to be disappointed.

Sunday night we went to the "Chaing Mai Sunday Night Market". No they don't have an ad agency doing their marketing, that why it is called exactly what it is... no offense to ad agencies.

It really is amazing. It goes for blocks and blocks and blocks with street vendors all set up side by side by side. Old men, young girls, families all selling their wares, many of them hand made and one of a kind. There is food and drink, music and monks (Not that the Monks are dancing. I don't think they are allowed to dance.)

We walked for hours part of this amazing human parade and its cast of thousands. There were folks who had their own karoke machine and would just be singing in the middle of the street. Some were rather good and some sounded like me when I am alone in my car driving across the Nevada desert where I am sure no one can hear.

There were beautiful art pieces made by gifted silversmiths, handwoven scarves, silk ties & dresses, hand embrodiered table runners. Some aboslutley amazing stuff.

For those of you looking forward to some lovely Thai gifts from us here is a list of what we bought at the Chaing Mai Night Market:

3 - doughnut kind of things with chocolate in the middle

3 - pancakes filled with creme

3 - Ice Cream Cones

3 - Frozen Spritesickles

3 - Foot massages

Hope they make it through customs.

love

Tammy

Suzi &

Shawna

Thailand Trip Theme

Frommer’s Travel Book for Thailand suggested that you could give your trip to Thailand a theme. For instance, some folks come to Thailand and take several Thai cooking classes. Other people will have architecture as a theme. Still others will visit several Temples, talk with the Monks and study Buddhism. After great thought and careful deliberation, we decided to have our theme be “Massages of Southeast Asia”.

See, once the hope of any puritanical discretion had been lost in a hotel room in Manila and all dignity abandoned in a train’s bathroom we pretty much decided to adopt the mantra “what the hec.” (A rather elegant merging of both the Thai and Utah cultures… We deserve some sort of ambassadorship title.) These losses, coupled with our extremely positive experience with the foot massage in the Bangkok Train Station sent us out with great anticipation for the successful execution of our trip theme.

After leaving the Elephant Camp we checked in at The Green Tulip Guest House. (We’ll tell you about this great find later.) We asked the woman who owns and runs the place if there was somewhere close where we could maybe get a massage. We didn’t share with her that it was our trip theme as she might be a Puritan with dignity and kick us out of her establishment. So we tried not to act overly enthusiastic.

She said that there is actually a program in Chiang Mai for female prisoners. The prisoners are trained in Thai massage thus giving them a marketable trade and helping with their rehabilitation. She said they were running a special: 2 ¼ hour Thai Massage and an Herbal rub Thingy for 500 bhat. They would come pick you up and drop you off when you were done.

That’s not exactly what she said but we really didn’t hear anything except “2 ¼ hour massage”. We huddled up to discuss if 500 bhat meant we would need to take out 2nd mortgages, which we were more than willing to do. We did some complicated computations… I lied, Tammy & Suzi did what appeared to be a combination of trig and quantum physics where they divided 500 by the exchange rate… whatever that is, and told me it would cost about $15.00 each.

$15.00!!! Are you kidding me? We were all ready to give up a kidney or at least make Suzi give up hers and they tell us $15.00. I swear it was like “Field of Dreams”, only with massage instead of baseball. And the honest truth, she could have said male prisoners and we would probably still have said, “What the hec. It’s $15.00 for the love of Pete!”

We told the woman it seemed like a noble cause and we were happy to do our part to support it. One hour later a van picked us up and dropped us off at a spa. (And here we were all ready to go to the prison.) As it turned out, they are recently released prisoners who were trained while in prison. Oh!?! 2 ¼ hour massage at a spa for $15.00 and Suzi keeps her kidney. Does it get any better?

We go in and … here’s the ironic part… they have us change into orange jump suits. They bring us some tea and lead us into a comfortable dimly lit room with several foam beds. All serene all warm, all inviting and disarming. You are probably getting sleepy just thinking about it. Well don’t!

First a word about little Thai women: They maybe weigh 90 lbs dripping wet and have these sweet faces and charming smiles. Do not let this fool you. And do not, we repeat do NOT get into a street fight with them because they will tear you up!! They aren’t just strong the are WWF strong, but without a metal chair over your head.

Second a comment on Thai massage: They use their boney little elbows. They use their knees. They punch you. They walk on you. They use a vise like death grip that could make a Navy Seal buckle and cry for his momma. And they mix it up with some very pleasant extremely soothing massage techniques as well. About half way through we realized we were suffering the effect of Stockholm syndrome, but they had pushed some nerve point known only to Thai people making it utterly impossible for us to resist.

We’ve been back 2 more times.

Elephants n Pajamas

This is the part where you are going to get really jealous and forget we ever used a bedit as a shower.

Arriving in Chiang Mai, we immediately got a taxi which took us about 30 minutes into the mountains to Maesa Elephant Camp. We had signed up for the 1-day Mahout Training Course. When I set this up I knew it was going to be a little hokey and very touristy but I really didn't care and Tammy and Suzi were game for whatever.

As it turned out it was hands down one of the most amazing experiences any of us have ever had. They greeted us at the entrance of the camp shleped all our bags down into the camp. They took us to this amazing little cabin with 3 beds and a private bath which we would be able to use throughout the day.

On the beds they had laid out our Mahout Training clothes. They looked like blue pajamas and also included a totally cool safari hat. We know that when you see the pictures we will be innudated with requests to bring them back to all of you. Well we can't, because only people who have been especially trained can wear these outfits, so save your e-mail stamps we can't get you the PJs or the hat.

Mahouts are the folks who train and keep the elephants. When an elephant is pregnant, nearing the end of her 18 - 22 month term... Yep that's right imagine if the doctor told an expecting mother they will have their baby in one and half to two years, give or take... The mahout actually sleeps near the elephant and once the baby is born continues to sleep nearby to make sure everything is okay.

We learned some of the basic commands:
Ben sai - Turn left
Ben qua - Turn right
Pi - Go
How - Stop
Ouch - Don't step on me

We learned how to mount the elephants, which Tammy kept calling "horses". (I can't begin to explain why.) And then drum roll... we rode them around and then up into the jungle and down to the river were we bathed and scrubbed our amazing Mastadone decendants.

Tammy rode and worked with SongPen and Suzi with WanPen and mine was MaeMa. Mine was a little older and didn't seem in a hurry to be anywhere too fast. I think God was trying curb my "road rage" tendencies and teach me a little patience. There is not a lot you can do if your elephant is perpetually walking as if she is going through a school zone.

After the baths we went to the the Elephant show where the elephants played soccer, did a parade thingy, painted pictures, played the harmonica and had a dart competition against our own Tammy. Who won... like beating an elephant at darts makes her an Irish Bar contender.

The son of the owner of the park came over later and explained the philosophy of the park and answered any and all of our questions. He probably spent about 30 minutes with us and then made a presentation of our diploma as honary mahouts. They were so earnest, kind and sincere, it took out all the corney factor and we felt truly honored.

At the very end of our day we each got to paint a picture with WanPen. No kidding! We would get paint on the brush, point on the canvas where we wanted Wan Pen to paint and then the mahout would give a command for either stroke or blot.

WanPen painted a painting that sold for 1.5 million dollars that is in the Guiness Book of World Records. Our painting came free with the Mahout Course. Seriously so cool! The elephants are such a noble animal it was a once in a lifetime treat getting to spend the day with them.

This little narrative just doesn't do it justice.

tammy, suzi, & shawna

p.s.
There used be over 20,000 elephants in Thailand. Now that logging machinary has made the elephant need obsolete and city sprawl is taking away their habitat. They figure there are only about 3000 elephants in the country today. These camps serve to feed and care for them as well as breed them.

Here are links to the camp:
http://www.maeaelephantcamp.com/
http://www.gallerymaesa.com/

Bathroom training

The spell checkers are awake so we're back...

After the Speed Tour of the Grand Palace we made it back to the train station with time to spare. As we were walking through the station to get our bags, Tammy asked, "are you sure there isn't something else we want to do before we pick up the luggage?"

Now this was rather rhetorical because as she said this she looked longingly at the little shop there in the station with a sign reading "Thai foot massage - 1 hour 200 baht". 200 baht is about 6 U.S. dollars and one hour is about 60 minutes. When you factor in the pleasure value it is like Denny's giving away a Grand Slam breakfast for free only more betterer.

Lucky for Suzi they had three chairs and 3 massagers (can't spell the other word). So we all sat down and found out what the next world is like if you are really, really good and always recycle. Seriously it was AMAZING worth the every one of those frequent flyer miles we used to get here.

We had planned on only doing it for 45 minutes so we would have time to get our luggage and make the train. When 45 minutes rolled around we had forgotten we had luggage and they could barely make us leave when the full hour was up.

We made a mad dash for the bags and a couple of really nice porters helped get us loaded on and into our air-conditioned sleeper car. We had two adjoining rooms which were actually very comfortable and private. First class all the way for about $35.00 each.

Our porter took our dinner order and we watched Bangkok go by our windows for the next hour or so. Dinner came and then another porter came and made up our beds. By 9 o'clock we were tucked in and sleeping. I have to admit I was a little disappointed they did not read us a bedtime story.

Okay that was all the good stuff but now the ugly under-belly of train travel... the bathroom/shower/sink... You don't sit, you stand over and try to aim. Yes folks, in a moving-rocking/swaying train. For Tammy this was not big problem as she only stand about 4 foot nothing and is only 20 inches from the target zone. For Suzi and I it required a greater degree of marksmanship.

My 1st venture in completely grossed me out and I determined I could wait 13 hours or till we were back in the States. I know, I know "the ugly American", but when I went in the first time there was wet all over the place. And, growing up with three brothers it was like my very worst nightmare was realized. I could not go through the train screaming, "Who in the name of heaven used the bathroom last?!?"

The next day, Tammy who had gotten up in the wee hours of the morning (no pun intended) had showered... At least that is what she told us with her hair all wet. Suzi and I looked at her like she was suffering from the dementia of Dengue Fever. Tammy assured us it was quite clean and most of the spray we had seen before was from the bedit. Still, not an extremely comforting thought. After the long day of travel in the heat and the sprint throught the Grand Palace... well let's face it, Suzi and Tammy were really stinky.

Tammy shamed Suzi into showering and then I followed along... for the fellowship. I felt a little better about the whole thing knowing I was following those two though I couldn't help but think over and over again, "I can't believe I am doing this. I can't believe I am doing this..."

I will spare you the details but know that it was not pretty and it did involve the use of the bedit hose as the shower-head. For those of you who know longer want to know us, we don't blame you.

Tammy has been monitoring our vitals and so far we show no signs of Hep A or B.

ox

suzi, tammy and shawna

The Grand Palace in 40 minutes

We arrived just fine in Bangkok; this is the same airport that was the scene of rioting several weeks ago. Fortunately all was quiet on the Eastern Front and everything was very modern and clearing customs, seamless. We had purchased our train tickets 60 days in advanced to gaurantee we would get sleepers cars so we met the courrier with our train tickets there at the airport. All in all... a piece of cake.... mmmm cake.

We had originally thought we would leave our bags at a "luggage /leave" area at the Bangkok airport, do some sight seeing and come back and get the bags before heading to the train station. But after we looked city map... okay I lied... after Tammy and Suzi looked at a map we decided... lied again... Tammy and Suzi decided it would logistically impossible to to go all the way into Bangkok see or do anything and travel back to the airport and back to the station in time for our 6 o'clock departure. See this is why I hate maps; it didn't seem that far to me when I looked at it.

So, we got a taxi and headed into Bangkok to the Hua Lamphong train station and were pleased to discover there is actually a place there at the station where we could leave our luggage, which we did. A very kind and helpful "visitor guide" at the imformation desk encouraged us that we would have enough time to make it to the Grand Place and back to the station before our train left. She even told us how much the taxi would probably be and told us not, I repeat NOT to take one of tuk-tuk as the drivers can't be trusted and they will try to rip us off.

We immediately left this woman who had been so helpful in every way, never giving us a reason to doubt her, and said "yes" to the 1st tuk-tuk driver who agreed to take us to the Grand Place for 50 baht, the amount the sweet woman had told us would be pretty fair. We got about a quarter mile from the train station and the tuk-tuk driver pulled over and started trying to sell us some tour and told us the Grand Palace would be closed and we would never make it.

I don't know why any of us were suprised, but we were both shocked and appalled and he in about 30 seconds had three mad hornets demanding he either take us to the Grand Palace now or we would leave. He kept trying to talk us into something else so we got out and marched off in the opposite direction. We didn't know where we were but we able to flag down a metered taxi who got us to the Grand Palace.

There are people who will spend a whole day at the Grand Palace studying the amazing architecture, getting a feel for the history of this jewel of Bangkok. Speaking with the volunteers or guides and gaining a great appreciation for the wonder this place is. We are not those people.

We did the Grand Palace in just about 40 minutes and we each thought that was just about right. Now don't get us wrong... this place is honestly breath taking, absolutely beautiful, but our appreciation for it was perfect right at 40 minutes. Just about the time our A.D.D. started to kick in, Tammy found an Hagen Daas ice cream shop and our whole experience with the Grand Palace was made... perfect.

We are in Chiang Mai right now our 2nd night and there is a TON of stuff to catch you up on but it is 11:00pm and my two "spell-checkers" have fallen asleep so we will call it a night.

Manila in 24 hours

We flew Korean Air from LAX to Seoul, a 13 hour flight. I personally slept 10 of those hours missing dinner service which Tammy and Suzi said was a delicious Pot Roast dinner with potatoes and carrots. I also slept through a couple of snack runs and several beverage services. I was out cold.

Suzi and Tammy slept fitfully but they weren't too cranky. We had an hour and a half layover in Seoul, so after going through a recheckin, just had time to make our flight. Again, these little Korean flight attendants were up and down the isles with several drink services, a snack service and a full blown lunch. Tammy and Suzi got the Chicken-Fried Rice. I do not know what I got. It was a "traditional Korean meal" and came with instructions. The only thing I did understand was "seaweed soup". It was salty... go figure.

After 33 hours of airplanes and terminals we arrived in Manila. Suzi and Tammy were very stinky. I was not. We took a rather exciting taxi ride through Manila. It became apparent that street signals & lane lines are considered suggestions rather than mandates. .... You know how in stop and go traffic you may keep your foot close to the brake? They opt to trade the "brake-foot" for the "horn honking hand". It is all very aggressive and indiscriminate... I liked it a lot! We've included a picture of the locals taxi since the massage pictures aren't appropriate (see below).

As it tuned out we saw most of what we saw in Manila looking out the taxi and hotel window. By the time we got to the Pearl Manila we were to beat to venture out. so we had a late lunch, exercised in the hotel and then had three little Phillapino women come to our room for a massage.

About the massages... Okay you know how in the States you have peaceful music and you lay on massage tables with sheets draped and tucked so as not to expose any more than the body part that is being worked on? This was not like that. There was a towel which I gripped like a life jacket on the Titanic. At one point when it appeared she was going to massage my breasts, aka "the girls", the towel was yanked down and my hands shot into position over my two flotation devices and I urgently informed her I would not care to have any knots worked out here. She sweetly said "Yes ma'am" and moved onto other places.

Tammy and I were in the same room so I kept my eyes tightly closed the entire time and prayed that she was doing the same. At one point I heard Tammy exclaim, I don't believe I've ever done a stretch quite like that." Tammy later informed me, because upon hearing that I vowed to never open my eyes again, that the little woman had taken her left leg crossed at the knee over the right leg and the pushed them both back over Tammy's head.

All I know, is if they had done this to me Tammy and Suzi would have spent the night in the hospital with me hooked up to a morphine drip... wich wouldn't have been the worst thing for me.

Believe it or not it was actually quite wonderful and these little women worked us over for a full hour for $12.00 each. We each gave them a pretty good tip and a bag full of M&Ms which they were very excited about.

We are now in the Manila Airport waiting and heading to Bangkok for Elephants & Tigers.

LAX... nowhere to go and all day to get there

Hey Friends and Family,

We got into LAX about 3:15 this afternoon and our flight on Korean Air to Manila doesn't leave till 1:00 in the morning. There was actually talk of going to Disneyland but Suzi is afraid of things that go fast. This is why she has only dated slow men.

We got a 30 day pass to the Crown Room which has been really nice because they give you Nutella, crackers and beer for free.

ox

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